I had a hunch I was pregnant. Wasn't late, just a feeling. Decided to dig out expired old cheap tests. Forgot about it and walked back in to toss it and saw the faintest color. I'll let you in on a little secret....infertiles can see lines before 99.9% of the population can see lines. It's our super power.
Marched downstairs and thrust it in the husband's face, "Do you see anything?" and looked at him annoyingly. Those are the magical pregnancy announcements I dreamed of. 1st baby got a gift and a card. 2nd baby got a Starbucks cup that said Daddy. 3rd baby got something cutesie. This baby.... pee stick and cranky wife in the face. Magical.
I continued to pee on random (expired) tests all weekend. Monday morning I was at the clinic begging to be stabbed. 309.7. Repeat on Wednesday 909.3. Progesterone suppositories and ultrasound scheduled for 7 weeks. And I'm left to freak out.
Told my usual partners in crime.... again, nothing cute and fun. No videoing... and strict instructions not to be excited. I told my Dad on the phone. Yeah, there's one for the baby books.
What's different this time? I started the aspirin and progesterone earlier. I'm trying to exercise more and stay hydrated. And I'm nauseated. Like green and gaggy. I'm convinced it's a great sign, but wow it's fun.
I feel robbed of the fun and excitement. I'm still so incredibly guarded and realize this probably won't end well. I'm still hoping and praying Cuatro will be in our arms soon.
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