It's The Least Wonderful Time of the Year

Once a year it sneaks up on me..... Mother's Day.   Out of no where a call, email or mailing slaps me right in the face.   Specials on flowers,  jewelry and all the other things women love.... specials on all the things that I have no one to give them to. 

Right after Mom died,  this day was spent in bed hiding from the world.   Last year, it was a bit happier because I was officially a step-mom (even though my husband failed to acknowledge the day.... sore spot).  This year; however, has a new sadness thrown in.   I'm the wanna be Mom who has empty arms.

I refuse to crawl back in bed and hide from the world.   I plan on taking my step-mom her gift,  taking flowers to the cemetery, visiting my Mama Tammy (she "adopted" us after Mom died....I still swear my Mommy had something to do with sending her to take care of us) and getting ready for my business trip to Canada.   I've learned distractions help me cope (yes we call that avoidance).  The sweet card from Perry helped too (Dad did better this year)!

So Happy Mother's Day to all the Moms out there.   I hope you treasure the Mom you have and treasure the gift of the little ones that gave you the title of Mom.

Happy Mother's Day in heaven,  Mommy.  I love you. 

Kid's Fair Fun

Our local Children's Hospital holds an annual Kid's Fair at the mall.  Of course I take advantage of free and fun events when we have Perry with us so we headed there this morning.  This year was a super hero theme so it was a definite win win.

He was entertained for well over an hour with carnival games, face painting, tattoos, educational booths,  characters,  and other fun stuff.   He was also quite proud of his loot and aside from us having his blood sugar tested (family history of diabetes) he enjoyed everything.

I love spending time with my boys and it's a bonus when that time teaches lessons about not smoking,  eating healthy,  performing cpr and other health topics.   We'll definitely be going back next year!

The Things People Never Tell You About Marriage

I don’t know if any of this stuff is universal or if I’m just an odd duck.  Either way, here’s my take on marriage so far. 

1.)    There is a feeling of, “now what?,” after the dating, engagement and wedding are over.  All of these parts are so exciting and busy and hectic and then after the honeymoon, there is almost a sense of confusion about what to do next.  I honestly think that our buying a house was my solution to solving this problem.  Not sure what to do after we’re done with that (WE GET THE KEYS TOMORROW!!).

2.)    On the flipside of comment 1, there is a feeling of comfort that kicks in after the madness is over.  To sum it up, he’s mine – he can’t run, hide or getaway.  That ring has marked my territory and I kinda like it.

3.)    Being the second wife is hard.  Some days it is REALLY hard.  He’s done all of this before, to me it is new and exciting.  Keith makes it a point to always remind me that this marriage is completely different than his first, but there is still a part of me that wishes I was his first wife.  For some reason, the fact that she kept his last name really irks me more…petty, I know.

4.)    Being a stepmom is harder.  Not because of the kiddo, I love him and couldn’t be happier to be his stepmama, but simply because it involves his ex-wife in our lives SO much.  If she didn’t make it a point to be so heinous and uncooperative, it would make life much simpler, but for the next 11 years +, I just bite my tongue and struggle through.  I don’t agree with her parenting choices, but I’m kinda stuck.  Hugs and laughter and fun times with the munchkin are a good band-aid.

5.)    It’s a big adjustment to learn to deal with each other’s quirks.  It is hard to untrain and retrain someone in their bad habits.  It takes a while to learn to compromise and decide what is best for our family instead of just me or him.  Luckily, we spat and work it out and then laugh about it in the long run.

6.)    There is nothing better than having someone to kiss you hello and goodbye daily.  He leaves for work earlier than I do, so my morning peck is usually during my wake-up moments, but it still makes me smile.

7.)    In-laws aren’t the horrid creatures that people make them out to be!!  I was scared to death after some of the horror stories I have heard.  Keith’s parents are amazing and his siblings are quickly becoming some of my favorite people!  I’ve loved spending time with all of them over the past two years.

8.)    Age really is just a number.  Keith is 6 years older than me and it never crosses my mind until we talk about milestones.  The day he mentioned something about graduating high school and I realized I was in elementary school, that kinda made me gag a little, but aside from that, it doesn’t faze me.

9.)    Combining finances is the only way to go.  This was never up for discussion for me, but it really honestly baffles me why people don’t combine and compromise on this area.  I’m not judging, just saying, for us, it has made life so much simpler. 

10.)  The expectation to instantly have kids is overwhelming.  I feel like a slacker right now.  Maybe that can be the next source of entertainment after the house is done.  ;)

Overall, marriage is wonderful.  It isn’t all rainbows and kittens, but it is surely worth it in the end.  I’m anxious to see how ours grows, develops, changes and thrives over years to come =)